You turned my wailing into dancing;
you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.
I am, in all seriousness, praying this for Caden this week. I know it may sound funny, but by all means this promise extends to little people. And those of you who are familiar with preschoolers know that they have their sackcloth! Whether it be anger, kicking, screaming, convulsing, or sobbing like their heart will break over the socks they are made to wear, they are emotional folk.
The past couple of days have been really challenging, parenting Caden. I just have had trouble even knowing how I should respond to him. I don't know what is going on, (besides me PMSing) that has made the difference. But today I came across something in a Beth Moore Bible study that said, You were God's 1st and only choice to parent your child. You may have trouble applying "chosen-ness" to a motherhood role as maybe you feel like you defaulted into the position. But ordinary events are never coincidental in the lives of God's people.
This encouraged me greatly. And I know God will give Shann and I wisdom as we ask for it. For right now, though, I'm quite grateful that he has turned Caden's wailing into sleeping. :)
2 comments:
I JUST finally sat down...and saw you had updated your blog...and thought I'd first of all say...HELLO! :-) And secondly...I was just in the midst of some frustration concerning Makenzie. It's an absolutely gorgeous day and she has been running in the house for the last 30 minutes every few minutes screaming & carrying on about bugs...they are flying in her hair...they are buzzing by her head...they are ALL over...oh, the drama. What in the world to do about that? Erg. So, from the depths of my motherly heart...I told her that if she comes inside again to scream & freak out (after I have had MANY conversations with her about how bugs live outside. God made them. They are more scared of you...all of that) I told her that she will have to go to bed. I mean...what to do, really?
For some things...there are no black and white answers and that can sometimes be such a challenge. But, at the same time, it also allows us the freedom and the grace to help guide our children and/or help them to work through their own feelings. I mean, the world is a big scary place. I'm even scared sometimes! And sometimes I forget that as my children grow, they are going to be encountering more and more new and different things and learning more and more new things and it can be pretty overwhelming. Not to mention the expectations we sometimes put on them as well as the expectations they put on themselves. The ways we think they should be acting vs. the ways they actually act sometimes. The things we think they should enjoy vs. the things they have decided they enjoy. So many choices and so many decisions and I think when we as parents are open, loving and caring and want what is best for our children...we can sometimes even be too hard on ourselves when our kids go off the deep end or behave in ways that we think shouldn't be happening. And in it all, sometimes I think God uses the personalities of our children (quirks, misbehaviors & all!) to show us who WE really are as parents. What WE think is important and sometimes God wants to change our hearts and what we think our role is. So many times in discipline & redirection with my children, I learn valuable lessons as well. And sometimes in those lessons, I have to say that I am sorry for the way that I handled a situation or sometimes for the expectations I place on my kids. I forget sometimes that they are just kids. When I look at my children, I have to take into account their age. For example...Madden. He's only been on this earth for 3 years! ONLY 3 years. What I have learned and mastered (or on my way to grasping things) has taken me over 30 years to learn. LOL. It just puts so much into perspective sometimes.
Someone told me something similar to what Beth Moore said...God gave us our children because he knew WE would be the best parents for our children. It's scary & humbling all at the same time.
I know you've expressed your challenges and how it's been difficult, but hang in there. I know you're a good mother and you have amazing, beautiful children. Us parents have to stick together and know that God gives grace to the humble and he will help us when we ask him to. Sometimes it's not black & white like I said...but whether it's just one more ounce of patience, just one more ounce of grace...he will provide all that we need. And in the meantime...locking ourselves in the bathroom for 5 minutes to have a good cry has been proven to work. :-)
Sarah, ah, yes! What wisdom God has brought you to! Love, Mom
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